Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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