if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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