i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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