i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
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Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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