Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
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He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
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She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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