We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
