he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize