Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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