You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
