After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
