He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Small penises have feelings too.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
