How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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