The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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