I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
