She announced her abortion via fbk
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
