He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize