Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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