don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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