Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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