Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
