Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
