Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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