i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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