I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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