i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
