I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
sex in a hospital.. check
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
