look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
