You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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