I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
