i think my tv is drunk
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize
