Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
