he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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