Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.