did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
