So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
