this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
