Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
