after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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