God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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