Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.

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(647): View more from Ontario

if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.

Fav 6 5311 836
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(256): View more from Alabama

this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?

Fav 3 2252 880
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(907): View more from Alaska

Threesome in a minivan. New low

Fav 15 2016 1217
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(504): View more from Louisiana

As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!

Fav 18 3496 1032
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(757): View more from Virginia

I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil

Fav 8 1310 1485
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(208): View more from Idaho

I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.

Fav 4 1113 548
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(770): View more from Georgia

Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich

Fav 1 390 163
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(870): View more from Arkansas

God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.

Fav 0 44 42
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