it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize