Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
