i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
