i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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