It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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