He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
