actually, I'm a sock model
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
