...so i touched it.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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