he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
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his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
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is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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