I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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