My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
